"The LORD is near to the brokenhearted, and saves the crushed in spirit." Psalms 34:18
NOT ALL WOUNDS ARE VISIBLE.
Emotional, and Verbal Abuse wounds are invisible on the outside, but the scars and pain left behind can last for a lifetime.
You can tell if a person has been physically abused by observing a black eye, a bloodied lip or a broken arm, but how can you tell if a person is a victim of Emotional, or Verbal Abuse?
Let's take a look at what I call a "Black and Blue Heart" looks like.
First let's define this type of abuse.
EMOTIONAL/VERBAL ABUSE : "Abuse is a pattern of behavior used to gain and maintain power and control over another person."
Emotional/ Verbal Abuse includes non-physical behaviors such as threats, insults, constant monitoring, humiliation, intimidation,bullying, isolation, stalking.
There are many behaviors that qualify as emotional or verbal abuse, including:
*Name calling and putting you down.
*Yelling and screaming at you.
*Intentionally embarrassing you in public.
*Preventing you from seeing or talking with your family.
*Telling you what to do and wear.
*Damaging your property when they are angry.(Throwing objects, punching walls, kicking doors etc.)
*Blaming you for their abusive actions or behaviors.
*Crazy making/Gaslighting techniques to confuse or manipulate you.
*Accusing you of cheating and being jealous of your outside relationships.
*Threatening to commit suicide or threatening to harm you or your loved ones in order to keep you from breaking up with them.
*Threatening to have your children taken away.
(The above information describing Emotional/ Verbal abuse is from the website www.loveisrespect.org
I encourage you to visit this website for more information.)
Invisible abuse of this kind wears you down and erodes your self esteem. It robs us of our identity because we comply and become who "they" want us to be in order to keep the peace. We live in constant fear, anxiety and walk on eggshells.
Because we don't want the confrontation or the fight and drama, we learn to stuff.
Stuff our feelings, thoughts, dreams and desires. WE STUFF OUR STUFF!
We live in pain that no one sees. We put on the mask and hide. We avoid friends and family. We put up walls to protect our Black and Blue Hearts. We go through life. We carry on, we push through the pain, praying and believing, ONE DAY, one day it will get better, one day they will change, one day,one day, if only, one day.
How do I know? Because I lived it. For many years. No one knew.
I protected my abuser and I hid the pain, I went through the motions because I didn't want anyone to be disappointed in me or him. I was afraid to tell, afraid to fail, afraid to do anything.
Then, One day came.
Jesus came to protect me and to set me free. He came to heal my heart and fill me with His love. He gave me a new life. He gave me a wonderful man who loves me the way God intended love to be.
He gave me back my hope and my dreams. He restored my soul.
I am concerned about you today. I want to make sure you don't have to go through what I did. I want to make sure you're safe. I want to make sure you're okay. Because I love you and you are special to me and to God!
Do you see any red flags and warning signs?
STOP. Stop being the victim! Stop playing the games. Stop believing the lies. Stop the cycle and get some help and get protection before this gets any worse! Before you totally lose you and who God created you to be.
Psalm 9:9 "The LORD is a stronghold for the oppressed, a stronghold in times of trouble."
Romans 8:14-16 "For those who are led by the Spirit of God are the children of God. The Spirit you received does not make you slaves, so that you live in fear again; rather, the Spirit you received brought about your adoption to daughter and sonship. And by him we cry, "Abba Father." The Spirit himself testifies with our spirit that we are God's children."
Sticks and Stones...Names and Words do hurt!
LOOK HOW WORDS BECOME SWORDS. SWORDS that wound our hearts!
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Proverbs 12:18 "Reckless words pierce like a sword."
What is your definition of Love? What is their definition of Love?
HERE IS GOD'S DEFINITION OF LOVE:
I Corinthians 13 "Love is patient and kind; love does not envy or boast; it is not arrogant or rude. It does not insist on it's own way; it is not irritable or resentful; it does not rejoice in wrongdoing, but rejoices with the truth. Love bears all things, believes all things, hopes all things, endures all things."
Recognize the fact that you are not reading this by accident. This is a divine appointment for you from the Lord.
GOD LOVES YOU AND HE WANTS TO HEAL YOUR "BLACK AND BLUE HEART". HE WANTS TO RESTORE YOU TO WHOLENESS AND FILL YOU WITH HIS LOVE, PEACE AND JOY.
"For I know the plans I have for you, declares the LORD, plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you a hope and a future." Jeremiah 29:11
IF YOU ARE IN AN ABUSIVE RELATIONSHIP AND NEED HELP OR SOMEONE TO TALK TO ANYTIME PLEASE CALL the NATIONAL DOMESTIC HOTLINE, FOR 24/7 CONFIDENTIAL SUPPORT at: 1-800- 799-7233
or click on this link www.thehotline.org
I PRAY THE LORD PROTECTS, HEALS AND DELIVERS YOU IN JESUS NAME! Amen.
